A person who has been in a romantic relationship knows spats and disagreements, which often feel destabilizing, thus, prevent proper articulation, are inevitable. Many try avoiding them through various maneuvers, acting stubborn so that anybody else involved cannot speak up, pretending to come to an understanding under all circumstances, not discussing topics that might hamper harmony, etc. but unfortunately doing so paves way for adverse side-effects.
In following write-up, I have chalked down a few tips to resolve conflict naturally, or in other words, without professional intervention.
- Highly competent and experienced specialists offering couples counseling Los Angeles emphasized on significance of identifying the real issue before indulging in any argument. For instance, do not quarrel regarding toilet seat kept left up just because you are lonely.
- As much of the communication is nonverbal during fights, please be mindful of hand gestures, facial expression, and body language otherwise you might end up sending a completely wrong message.
- Pause and think if emotional agitation is a result of physical discomfort. Latest studies have shown that hunger, lack of sleep, muscle ache, etc. contribute to bad temper. Besides addressing the stated needs, stretching also releases tension.
- Abuse in any form is not acceptable. A leading medical practitioner has asked modern-day individuals to keep four behaviors namely criticism, stonewalling, defensiveness, and contempt at bay when fighting with their partner.
- Save time by not retaining ego, and admitting mistakes. This is not a sign of weakness but it demonstrates integrity, awareness, and most likely accelerates fruitful resolution. Making sincere amends or apologies help to a great extent.
- The ability to show you can comprehend how your partner feels is perhaps most powerful skill. You do not really have to agree with their opinions but reflecting empathy every now and then strengthens relationship.
- Hear out what your spouse has to say than assuming or drawing conclusions on your own. Consider fresh perspectives, ask questions for procuring substantial information, looking out for compromises or a win-win situation.
- Rather than expecting the other person involved to understand what exactly is bothering you, try telling directly. If you fail to interact, write down everything on a piece of paper, and give it to him or her.
- Finally, yet importantly, monopolizing conversation is an incredibly bad habit. Please change if you have a tendency of not listening to your partner but simply putting forward your own viewpoints.
Holding in grudge or resenting is quite similar to drinking poison but hoping it would kill all enemies. Well, according to specialists carrying out couples counseling Los Angeles for many years with acute precision, apart from diligently implementing each tip stated above, people must also be capable of learning from negative experiences, working towards acceptance, forgiving, and ultimately leaving past behind.
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